I'm Still Here:)

Hello Everyone!  You're probably wondering where in the world I have been!

I'm happy to report that I'm doing great!!!!!!!! 

I finished chemo in August and I did wonderfully with it all.  Very few annoying side effects, but overall I did great.  I'm finally getting my energy back, but it doesn't last too long! I'm also getting hair again....yay! Just wish it was growing as fast on my head as it is everywhere else...haha!!! I had my final reconstruction surgery on Sept 12.  It was a breeze! It was outpatient and I had very little pain. 

This coming week hopefully I will be beginning my radiation.  I have a CT Scan on Tuesday so the dr can see exactly where to do the radiation and hopefully it will start this week.  I'm so ready to get all of this over with.  The radiation will be for 6 weeks M-F.  The worst part of it will be the hour drive to and from the hospital.

I'm so thankful for all the Lord has blessed our family with.  I know if it had not been for him I would not have done near as good as I have!  Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers and Love!

God Bless~

Leslie

Feeling Good But......

So its been awhile since I have posted.  I guess the saying "No news is good news" applies here.  I have been doing really good. 

I have had three chemo treatments, I'm halfway over!!!! Yay!!!  My fourth treatment is this Thursday.  I always dread the treatment day a little because I feel so good for the week before treatment and then I feel yucky for about two weeks after.  Right now I feel great! 

But apparently my wonderful hubby decided he didn't like me getting all the attention and went and got sick himself:( He had been complaining of arm pain and had a rash come up just below his underarm.  We thought he had an allergic reaction to something and it would go away.  Well last Tuesday he woke up with the whole left side of his face paralyzed.  I took him to the ER and he said it was Bells Palsy possibly caused by Lyme's Disease.

He started on antibiotics and a steroid.  We got the results today that it is Lyme's Disease. He is having a lot of pain and discomfort and its hard for him to work.  Thats not good, considering all the dr bills that are starting to come in!

Please pray for us both! Pray for his quick healing and that his energy level will soon go back to normal and that he will be able to work.  Pray that I continue to do well and that I will be back to normal as soon as possible!

Thank you all for everything!!

God Bless~

Leslie

Chemo!!

It has been two weeks since my first chemo treatment.  I'm very happy to report that I feel great.

I have been very lucky and blessed not to be sick.  The only side effects that I have had so far have been loss of appetite (not a bad thing for me) but it has come back, diarrhea for a few days (Immodium was my best friend) and joint pain from the Nulesta shot to boost my white blood cells.  All in all I would say chemo is not nearly as bad as I thought it would be.  God is good!!!

One thing that I am having trouble with is the hair loss.  It has really started falling out a lot.  The shower drain was full this morning.  I have really tried to prepare for it but I don't think you can ever be truly prepared for losing your hair.  As a woman our hair is such an important part of our identity.  Not that I have long, beautiful locks.  I have always had a love/hate relationship with my hair and I've said on more than one occasion "I should just shave it all off and get a wig."

Well now I have the wig and am facing the reality of shaving it all off and it scares me to death.  I know its just hair and it will grow back eventually.  This is just one more bump in the road and if it takes losing my hair to get rid of this horrible disease then I will gladly take a few months of baldness.

On the plus side it shouldn't take me very long to get ready at all .  I'm also having fun looking for pretty scarves and hats too!!!

Thanks again for all the prayers and kindness that has been shown to me and my family.  We are forever greatful.

My next treatment is next Wednesday May 16.

God Bless you all!

~Love,

Leslie

Shower, Shower, Shower!!!!!

Hello Everyone!! I'm sorry not to update very often. I don't get on the computer very often these days.

I wanted to let you all know that I'm doing really great!! I had my last drain removed on Tuesday....Yay! I finally got to take a shower on Wednesday. I have never enjoyed a shower so much in my life. Four weeks of sponge baths was getting a little old!!! I stayed in there at least 30 minutes just letting the water run over me. I felt like a brand new woman when I got out...Wonderful!

Tomorrow is the Susan G. Komen race for the cure in Roanoke. It will be my first time attending. I will be walking in the one mile fun walk. I hope I can walk the whole thing, but I will take it slow and easy so I don't get too tired. I can't believe how many people are on my team and walking/running in honor of me. I'm sure it will be a very inspiring day!

On April 20 I go back to the oncologist to have my chemo teaching. Then chemo will start the following week. I don't know what day for sure yet. I'm not looking forward to this stage. Please continue to keep me and my family in your prayers. We have one big obstacle out of the way and will begin another. Hopefully I will not have to have radiation but will not know for sure until chemo is finished.

I also had my first "fill up" on Tuesday the day I got my drain removed. It wasn't very comfortable but it didn't hurt. I now have little mounds on my chest:) The reconstruction process is very long. I will go every two weeks for a "fill up" until they reach the size that "we" are happy with. Travis is very much part of this decision....haha!!! After that I will have the surgery to have the implants put in.

This is a long, road but so far its not as bumpy as I thought. God is carrying me through. My family are amazing and I have so many wonderful friends that continue to bring food, send money and gifts and cards. I have not had to buy groceries since the beginning of February. Thank you all for your love and support, it still amazes me!!!!

God Bless-

Leslie

Getting Better Everyday!!!

My surgery was on March 12. It has been awhile since I have even turned my computer on, much less updated. Sorry to keep you all in the dark for so long.

I am doing much better. Starting to feel like my old self again!!!

My surgery went well. It was 6 1/2 hours long. It was a long day for my family and friends but I just had a nice little nap and woke up in what seemed like a few minutes. I think my family had fun during my surgery too. They said I should have joined them they were having a party!!!


I had a couple rough days in the hospital. It seems Morphine does nothing for my pain. Once I convinced the nurses that I was in "real pain", they contacted the dr and he changed my medicine to Dalatid (sp). I was like a new woman, I was ready to get up and go for a walk within 15 minutes!!! Its amazing what good pain medicine can do for a person. I spent three nights in the hospital. It was so good coming home!!!

I had three drains when I came home. I am now down to one. It will probably have to stay for at least another week because it is still draining alot of fluid. I do not get a real shower until it is out!!! I'm so ready for a shower!!!

I go back to the dr on Friday! The plastic surgeon to check my drain and have my first pump up...haha!! He will begin filling the expanders that day and I will go back every two weeks for a few months until they are the correct size and then my silicone implants will be put in. It's a long process! I also go to the oncologist on Friday to find out when chemo will begin. He had said about a month after surgery. I'm thinking the week after Easter. I'm dreading it, but ready to get it over with and get my life back!!!

My husband has been absolutely amazing. I love that man so much!!! He has took such good care of me, the kids, and our home. I haven't had to do anything since coming home!! He has really suprised me:)

I have so many awesome people in my life that have done so much for me. I have not had to cook a meal since finding out my diagnosis!! People bring me meals each day, it's so amazing. Thank you to everyone for your calls, visits, flowers, food, money, and especially prayers. You will never know how very much it is appreciated!!! I'm a little behind on getting thank you cards out, but please know that it has not went unnoticed!!!

God Bless You All!!!

Love-

Leslie

It has been a few days since I have updated. I only had two appointments this week. Today I went to sign my consents for surgery and asked the dr some questions. I have to be at the hospital at 10:30 on Monday and surgery should begin around 12. I'm nervous but so ready to get it over with and begin this journey to get well.

Last night I had a stomach bug and was up half the night. I'm so glad I'm feeling better now. I don't want anything to put off my surgery.

My wonderful hubby has decided to make away for a little day trip tomorrow. We will go to Boone, NC just to walk around and look at shops. It will be nice to just spend some quality time together while I'm still feeling pretty good. He's been so great, I'm very lucky.

I have so many wonderful, caring people in my life right now. I'm so blessed!! My best friend since third grade brought me a gift over last night. I was so suprised her and her family gave me a Kindle Fire!!! It's awesome, but I still have to figure out how to use it. She's so sweet!!

So many people have done so much and been there for us. My mom and sister took me wig shopping on Tuesday. That was a lot of fun and I picked out a few cute wigs, but insurance only pays for one....bummer!! But the one I will get is still cute!

Thank you to everyone that has called, sent cards, brought food, gave money or gifts and especially thanks for all the prayers. I feel God in everything!!!

Love you all,

Leslie

Good News!!

Yesterday I received really great news!!! The CT scan and bone scan were both clear. The cancer has not spread to other parts of my body. Thank you Jesus! Now we just need to focus on getting better!

My surgery will be on March 12. Please remember me in your prayers. I am a little nervous about this surgery since I have never had anything major before. I will probably be in the hospital for two nights.

Thank you all for your support and love!!!

God Bless,

Leslie

More Tests Today

This stupid cancer thing really stinks!!!! I am trying my best to stay positive and upbeat but its getting harder everyday. I did have a wonderful talk with a great pastor today and he gave me the spiritual guidance and support that I needed!!!

Today I found out that it has spread to my lymph nodes. At least one is involved we will find out how many more during surgery and they will be removed. We do not have a defiant date yet but it should be the week of March 12-16 one of those days. I was prepared for the news that it was in the lymph and just pray that it is nowhere else.

I had a CT scan of chest and abdominal area and a bone scan today. It was kind of a funny story with the bone scan. First of all the nurse hurt really bad when she was trying to start my IV to put the contrast in. She blew a vein in my hand and it still hurts, oh well I guess I better toughen up huh!!! But the other nurse tried and she got it on the first stick and didn't hurt a bit....I like her!!!

So I had to go drink 32 oz of some yummy stuff. Which actually tasted pretty good since I had nothing to drink since before midnight. (Emma told me, if you get thirsty mommy just drink your spit, she's so funny). After I drank that and waited 45 minutes they took me in for the CT scan. The nurse put the stuff in my IV for that test. She warned me that I would feel warm starting from my head and going to my toes and it would feel like I wet my pants. Well she was so right. I got hot from my head and went all the way down and I was certain I had wet my pants. That is the weirdest feeling.

Then I had to wait about an hour to have the bone scan done. My mom was in there with me and the scan was almost finished, when the tech started acting really worried. She finally told me to slip my pants down around my knees. When I did that, the stuff that was glowing went away. She said maybe some pee splattered on your pants when you went to the bathroom...Ewww or maybe I really did pee!! Then she started looking at my upper body and it had places all lit up too. So I then had to remove my shirt and put on a gown. Those places went away too. I then remembered that when the girl did my CT that a little of the solution squirted out and must have went on my clothes causing them to be radioactive. My mom and the tech was about to freak out because it looked like my bones were covered!!! As far as we know that test is clear, after I stripped down she said nothing else glowed! Yay!!! We should know the results from both of those tomorrow.

I did get great news yesterday:) The BRCA1 andBRCA2 test came back negative. This means I'm not a carrier of the breast cancer gene. This is great news for my future, my sister and my daughter!!!

I still am overwhelmed with the kindness that everyone is showing to me and my family!!! It's very touching and helping me get through this. I know I have lots of tough days down the road but I'm keeping my head up!

God Bless,

Leslie

Feeling Blessed!

Today I received so many wonderful gifts. I'm completely overwhelmed by the love and generosity of so many people. If I learn nothing else from this illness I will learn how to be there for others when they are going through a tough time.

I'm humbled by seeing that so many people have signed up to bring food to my family. I had two families drop off bags of groceries for us today and money. We feel so very blessed and a little undeserving of everything.

Thank you to everyone. You will never know what an impact you have on me and my family. My children are learning life lessons each day of this journey. My hope is they will know how to treat people and be there for others!

I go tomorrow morning at 9 to the hospital to have the lymph node biopsied and more ultra sounds to make sure nothing has changed and to check out my right breast. After that I go to meet with the oncologist at 12:30. I hope we can make it to the oncologist on time!! I'm going to try to get a CT scan scheduled because I have been having a lot of back pain and want to make sure it hasn't spread to anywhere else. Please continue pray for me and my family!!!

God Bless!

Leslie

Hurry Up and Wait!!

Friday started as such a great day. My mom and I had plans to meet my wonderful aunt Brenda in Floyd at Schoolhouse Fabrics and shop for curtain fabric for my living room and just have a girls day. No doctor appointments were scheduled.

I received a call around 10 am from my surgeons office saying he wanted me to see the plastic surgeon and they could see me today at 1:00. I was kind of suprised and said no not today. Then my mom said you better take that appointment. So I did call back and get it. As soon as I hung up the phone the surgeon called. He was actually out of the office doing some kind of training and called me to let me know my MRI results.

It seems there is another lump in my breast, this makes three in my left breast. The third one is deeper in the tissue, not sure what that means yet. This means I will have to have a mastectomy on this side. The MRI also showed fibrocistic changes in my right breast that they wanted to check further with ultra sound. It also showed an enlarged lymph node under my left arm that needs to biopsied this week. My dr seems to think this was just enlarged as a reaction to the first biopsy. I'm praying he's right.

So I have decided to have a double mastectomy. If I'm getting one removed I my as well remove both and not have the worries. The plastic surgeon is great. He said we can have the reconstruction done at the same time as the surgery or later on. I have opted for the same time because it will only be one surgery and one healing time. This surgery really scares me and I know it will be so different. Travis and I are really trying to laugh about it. He said I can't pick out new ones without him!!! He has to approve...haha!

I will meet the oncologist Dr. Goldschmidt (sp) on Tuesday. From then I guess I will have the ultrasound and biopsy of the lymph one day this week. My surgeon is out of town this week, but I hope that the surgery will be scheduled for the following week. I'm ready to get this cancer out of me so I can start healing.

Today I was so humbled. I received gifts of money, cards, food and lots of paper products!!! Some money and cards came from people I have never met. There are lots of wonderful people out there that are showing how much they love and care. God is so good. I have to remember to honor him and give him the glory and remember that there will be people that fail me but he never will!

I have had pastors that I have never met call me just to pray over the phone!!! This has meant so much to me and I thank these men and their churches for everything. The devil likes to magnify the bad when we should be focused on the good.

I will keep you all updated as I find out. For now I will hurry up and wait!!!

Thank you all for the prayers and support. You will never know what it means.

Love you all,

Leslie

What Kind of Cancer Is It?

So when the dr told me I had cancer I went blank and couldn't ask any questions. I called back that evening when I was home and had got a little more composure. I had my mom talk to the nurse to find out the exact type. She said it was Invasive Ductal Carcenoma Grade 3. I got kind of confused and told a few people it was stage 3. So if you are reading this and thought it was stage 3 its not, its grade 3 (sorry for any confusion, don't know where my head was...haha). I do not know what stage it is yet. But I do know that there are 3 grades with 3 being the most aggressive.

I met with the surgeon on Friday the 16th. He seems to be very smart and genuinely concerned. He said that the tumor was small, right at one centimeter, so hopefully no lymph node involvement. He told me I would defiantly have to have chemo. I'm not looking forward to that at all. He said before we could plan any surgery that I need to have genetic testing to find out if I'm a carrier of the breast cancer gene. I met with her yesterday she was great, I should receive the results in two weeks.

I had to go for my MRI on Monday and it was unsuccessful. The dye that they use did not light up like its supposed to, so I had to go back and endure that lovely thing again today. I should find out those results in a few days.

I did learn yesterday that it is triple negative. This means that the cancer does not respond to hormone therapy so it is treated differently. If my genetic testing shows that I carry the cancer gene I will defiantly have a double mastectomy. If I do not have the gene it is my decision whether I want the mastectomy or lumpectomy. I have a lot to think about and pray about. I have always said that I would just get them old things removed and get me a brand new set of big ones. But its a little easier said than done. I know God will help me make the right decision.

The next few days I have no dr appts or any plans other than sitting back with my feet up and relaxing. I will meet with the oncologist next Tuesday on the 28th. I'm trying to keep my head up and stay strong. I know this will be a long bumpy road but I'm ready for the ride....I think!!!

Though I walk in the midst of trouble,You will revive me; You will stretch out Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and Your right hand will save me. Psalm 138:7

God Makes No Mistakes!

Two years ago in April a sweet little lady told my mom and I "Honey, God Makes No Mistakes" when she asked us why we were crying at a restaurant in Atlanta. We had just visited my sister and brother-in-law in the hospital where they were holding their precious baby boy that had been born stillborn at 32 weeks. That was one of the hardest days of our lives. My heart broke for her so much. But those words "God Makes No Mistakes" seemed to take some of the pain away.

Well now its my turn and those words are helping me get through this bumpy road that I'm currently traveling down. I am creating this blog to help keep my family and friends updated on my day to day progress. But I hope it is therapy for me too. Here is my story.

Sometime in the beginning of January (not sure of the exact date), I found a lump in my breast. I was in the shower, I think when I felt it. No I did not do self breast exams. I never knew what to look for, their not smooth you know! Anyway I was a little alarmed and told my husband that night. He said you better get it checked out. A few days later I told my mom and sister, (both are nurses), but I thought it had went away so we didn't make a big deal out of it.

Well I kept checking and I could find it when I laid down but not when I stood up. It felt really large to me about the size of a nickel or larger. One day I casually told my mom, "My lump is still there." She nearly freaked out, "What do you mean I thought it went away?" She had me immediately get an appointment with the gyno. I went on February 2. I seen a new Dr that I had never seen before and she was sooo sweet. She checked it out and said it was probably just a lymph node, I'm only 30 and probably had nothing to worry about. But she would send me for an ultrasound and mammogram just to ease my mind.

I had my mammo and ultrasound the following week on February 9. That was an experience. If you have never had a mammo I don't want to scare you, but boy they are no fun. Especially if you don't have very much "up top"!! So the mammo and ultrasound both showed up the tumor, not one but two. They were attached. The radiologist decided said she would like to do a biopsy to rule out cancer. She again was pretty confident that there was nothing to worry about but better be safe than sorry.

I had my biopsy on February 14, Valentine's Day. What a way to spend the day of romance!! My mom and husband went with me and took me out to a nice lunch afterwards:) The biopsy was uncomfortable but not nearly as bad as I expected. The radiologist said she would call with the results on Thursday afternoon or Friday morning.

Thursday around 11:30 I got the phone call while sitting at my desk at work. "Mrs. Cox this is Dr. Grover, I'm sorry to tell you this but it's cancer." After that I heard "laaa laaaa laaa, you need a MRI and to see a surgeon, I'm sorry." I dropped the phone and ran for the bathroom. My very sweet coworker, Betty a breast cancer survivor followed and hugged me while I cried for what seemed like an hour. She was wonderful, I know God put me in that job beside of her for that phone call!!

I then had to make the calls to my husband and my mom. That was so hard. I went home and hugged my husband, my parents came and we all sat and cried and hugged and cried some more. The kids came home from school and we had to tell them. That by far was the hardest part! They were very upset, but seemed to take it pretty good. But they are hurting far more than I will ever know.

I have to remember God Makes No Mistakes. This is in his plan and it will all work out okay. We are going to kick cancers butt!!!!